Of Coins and Cashiers

Last night as I was leaving the parking lot in the Rustan's open parking in Ayala, the cashier did something that really caught my ire. Coming from a long day at work and leaving my car in the parking lot for more than 12 hours, I expected my fee to be exorbitant as usual. True enough, it amounted to 135 pesos. But it was'nt the price that made me blow my top off, it was when I handed the cashier my hard earned 150 pesos and she demanded that I give her 5 pesos more so that she can give me 20 pesos in change. What was her reason for asking for the additional 5 pesos? She didnt have any coins with her! A cashier without any coins!! I would have normally let this one slide without further comment, but the fact that they do this to me 4 out of the 5 days that I park there eventually gets to you. Last night, I finally reached breaking point, when I told her that I did'nt have any coins on me to give to her and she had to use her radio to ask for coins from another cashier. I told her that it is basic practice for cashiers to have friggin' coins in their register, and that I thought it was rude for cashiers to ask patrons to give more that they should just because you don't have any change. In truth, I had the 5 pesos to give the cashier, and eventually I did give her the 5 pesos so that would'nt be held up any longer, but thats beside the point. My point is - IT'S YOUR OBLIGATION AS A RETAIL ESTABLISHMENT TO ALWAYS HAVE COINS IN YOUR REGISTER, AND TO ALWAYS BE READY TO GIVE YOUR CONSUMERS THE EXACT CHANGE WITHOUT HAVING TO ASK THEM FOR MORE! I believe that this is a very basic retail practice that all retailers should always keep in mind. This shows that even large retail establishments miss out on the seemingly trivial, but essential consumer right.

Rainisms - Another Dose

5. I am like a diesel engine...I take time to warm up, especially to people

6. When you meet me for the first time, you'll think that i'm either the perfect gentleman...or the biggest asshole

7. People think that i'm a boring and uptight person..that is partly true. If you're one of those people who think of me that way, we're probably just not close

8. You might think you have me all figured out, but like an onion, I've got many layers that you have to peel through one by one. And you're probably going to end up shedding tears in the process

9. I'm not a hard person to get along with, but if you're finding it hard to get along with me, its because i'm making it hard for you

Just a thought...I don't understand the phenomenon where its the untalented and undeserving individuals who attain celebrity and cult like status while the most promising people toil in the dumps. We Filipinos seem to adore mediocrity and shun excellence.

I was fortunate enough to attend Laura and Al Ries' Brand Marketing Conference over at the Philippine Plaza last week. For those who may not know who Al Ries is, he is a marketing guru and the co- author of the must read canon for all marketing practitioners - The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing. Laura Ries is Al's daughter who also happens to be a very competent marketing expert and author, and who could be on her way to becoming like dear old dad.

The conference was insightful and introspective, though I believe that a seminar that charges nearly 10,000 bucks should conjure that effect. Although I would say that what they presented was an updated version of the 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing, minus the laws that Jack Trout(Mr. Ries' co-author in the original book, I heard that he and Al had a falling-out) probably formulated, plus Laura Ries' inputs. Their presentation was highly visual and their delivery was spot-on (they must have presented this for God knows how many times).

My major peeve during the conference was when the question and answer portion of the program started. Al and Laura must have been kicking themselves and regretting they ever came after hearing the most stupid and non-sensical questions on the planet. Try answering these questions:

1. How do I know if I am the first in my category? - Whoever asked this question deserves to be burned alive

2. Questions along the lines of asking for concrete and specific strategies for their products - Al Ries doesnt give a rat's ass about your friggin product! And haven't you heard of consultancy fees. You're not about to get a free lunch pal!

3. There was one comment/question through the text line which literally said to the Reis' - "Your laws are CONTRADICTORY!" This was like giving Al Ries a bitch slap to the face! I wanted to hide under the table for the imbecile who gave this poorly thought of and worded remark.

I was embarrassed for the the people who actually thought that their questions made the slightest sense. To think that these people were professionals and marketers at that. Honestly, I never expected the level of questions to come from such a group of professionals. Its something even I would'nt even think or dare to ask, given my inexperience in the industry.

I don't know if it was just me, but were there any others who were the slightest bit offended when Al Ries quipped that he did'nt even know where the Philippines was in the map and was surprised to find out that we were in Asia. I know I was. For a marketing guru who harped on the advantages of going global and having global brands, its just funny that he does'nt really pay much attention to his geography.

RAINISMS 1

I'm going to start a new and ongoing post in this blog. I'm calling in "Rainisms". Its basically going to be an assortment of my random thoughts, musings, and ponderings thats probably gonna give you an idea of my personality, how my mind works, and what mood I'm in for the day. On some days, I might have a lot of scatter-brained thoughts, while on some days, there may be few. In a way, its also my way of keeping this blog active and giving my 2 readers something new to read regularly. Feel free to leave a congratulatory note, or hate mail, whichever way you look at it. Before I go on rambling, here's my first installment of Rainisms:

1. If my looks could kill, then I would be a mass-murderer

2. I realized that I'm probably never going to win the title of Mr. Personality or Mr. Congeniality

3. When someone says that you have a "staring-problem", what the fuck does it mean and what equally dumb-founding retort can I shoot back?

4. I recently found out that I can no longer pretend to like people and be chummy with them like I mean it. I used to be good at this.

I just came back from a business trip in Legaspi City, Bicol. It was my first time to go there, hopefully my last. Don't get me wrong, I did'nt have any horror stories to bring back. Legaspi City is a pretty, quaint, and sedate city. But there's all there is to it. Its major attraction, the Mayon Volcano, may be breath-taking when you first see it, but it does'nt last for long. It took me just over 30 minutes before I thought i've seen everything the city had to offer. I wanted to go home badly. I'll take Hong Kong or Singapore over Legaspi City anytime of the day...

Thank God for Diarrhea!

I'm finally back after more than a week of not posting. To my 2 or 3 readers who are beginning to get disappointed as to why I havent been writing anything, well here I am again. I've been sidelined for a while. I kinda caught a bug thats been going around the house lately, thats caused me to take a dump like theres no tomorrow! Well, im going to spare you the gory details here, but if you want to ask me, I can answer you in private. Haha! After losing almost 7 pounds in 2 days (believe me, this can happen. try crapping every hour on the hour for a whole day), eating nothing but plain crackers, I can say that I enjoyed my 2 days of convalescing at home. I was able to get a much needed R&R, even at the expense of a chafed asshole. I was able to think a lot as well, of my current state, and of the state I want to be in. I was also able to catch up on my share of leisurely reading and DVD watching. I was also able to stop for a while and catch my breath. I also lost a few pounds and getting closer to my ideal weight. This must be the most rewarding sickness i've had! I'm starting to see diarrhea in a positive light!! Now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to have a drink of dirty water.